Relationships VS Gift Giving

         

                                      GIFT GIVING

       Getting and reserving gift are great! It is even greater in relationships. Giving a gift is a great way to show the one you love how well you know their personalty and what they like. Gift giving doesn't come easy for everyone. Shopping for gifts can get confusing and stressful! There are so many different types of gift giving events through the year such as birthdays, anniversary, and of course holidays. Here are a few tips to getting the best gift for him or her.

                        

                                        Gifts for her

         Guys don't panic! I know how stressful it must be to shop for that special gift for that special lady. Here are a few tips to keep in mind while shopping. 1) What is the occasion? :  Occasion means everything! You tend to go bigger the bigger the occasion. Sometimes more goes into the gift for different occasions. For your anniversary take your lady got on a romantic dinner to a place that really means something special in your relationship like where you had your first date. If you can manage not to burn down your home make her her favorite meal. For her birthday plan a surprise birthday party for her! Invite all her closest friends and family. 2) Her like and dislikes. While shopping keep in mind her favorite, scents, colors, brands, actors, authors, stores, and styles. 3) Listen! She will drop hints fellas so keep your ears open! She will guide you to the gifts she has been wanting. Now for some gift ideas!

•  FOR THE MUSIC LOVER! : If your lady is a singer or musician some great gifts would be Beats head phones ( $110 +), A itunes gift card, Her favorite artist new album ( $20 ), A mix CD of all her favorite songs, if you are musically gifted write and perform a song just for her, or take her out to a concert that she has been dying to go to. 
• FOR THE MAKEUP AND FASHION LOVER! : Plan her a day of beauty! Take her to get her hair, makeup and nails done then pick a spending limit and take her on a shopping spree. Then pick her out a special outfit to take her out to a special dinner.
• FOR THE BOOKWORM! : Buy her a kindle or nook and add a few of her favorite books or a few of her favorite authors. Buy her a year subscription to her favorite magazines.
• FOR THE JEWELRY LOVER! : DIAMONDS ARE ALWAYS A GOOD IDEA! Know her sizes, her favorite color, her favorite gems, her favorite cuts, and designers.
• FOR THE TRAVELER! : Pack your bags boys! Take her on a romantic get away for two. Take her to her favorite place or somewhere she has always wanted to visit.
• FOR THE MOVIE BUFF! : Take her to a romantic movie that she has been dying to see, cuddle up on the coach have a marathon of her favorite movies, take her to a drive in movie or a movie in the park. 

                                 

                                    GIFTS FOR HIM

        Lets face it ladies we live for getting gifts and shopping for them! We will take any reason to head to the mall! Guys are super easy to please and even easier to shop for but of course we go the extra mile to make it special.  We as woman tend to wanna out do everyone else same goes for gifts! The better the gift the better girlfriend you are. The problem with being such good gift givers is we have to out due that gift the next Christmas or birthday! If you just started shopping for the guy you just started dating and  you really wanna impress him here are a few gift ideas.

• THE GAMER GUY! : Get this fellas the newest hottest game that he has been wanting ( $60 ) up that by getting him the special edition of that game. Get him a new customized controller or head set. If the game he really wants isn't out go ahead and pre-order is for him. If you really have some extra cash and really REALLY love him get him the newest consoles. 
• THE SPORTS FAN! : Take your man to see his favorite teams play. Buy him his favorite team member jersey. Buy him any sports related!
• THE EATER! : Make him his favorite meal with a little something something special for dessert.
• THE NERD! : Buy him all the new electronics! Ipods, Beats, New desktop computer or laptop, kindle or nook, or the smartest smart phone
• THE CAR LOVER : Take him to a car show.
• THE BLING BLING GUY! : A new watch, ring, or necklaces. Matching jewelry always cute and special.

                     

       My best advice is you don't have to spread millions of dollars for something to be special. After all the most special gift you give to him/her you give to them every moment everyday. The great gift you can give someone his your heart, endless love, and affection. Diamonds lose their sparkle, we grow out of clothes, and the newest games or technology is always yesterdays news. All the must have material things just wide up sitting around just collecting dust. What really sticks is what comes from the heart. A romantic love note, A good romantic home cooked meal, a home made mix tape made up of all those romantic love songs that mean the most, a slow dance under the stars, a walk on the beach, or a home message. Make something that they will treasure for a life time. True love never dulls its spark. A heart never collects dust. Make it come from the heart. Make your gift mean something special. Keeping living. Keep loving.

                                                                                                                                                                                             xoxo wizzy  

Relationships VS Personal Space

      


                                                 RELATIONSHIPS VS PERSONAL SPACE



       Boundaries and personal space can become some what challenging in growing relationships. The invasion of personal space usually comes later in relationship. Invasion of personal space can occurs when a couple desires to move in together for the first time.  Here is a few ways to handle if your personal space is being invaded in a relationship.


                   


      Woohoo! What an excited time in your relationship! You have decided to move into together! This may feel a little strange but wonderful for those of you moving in with someone other then your parents for the first time! It was great at first. Just the two of you. Cuddling. Watching movies. Walking around naked. Slowly falling a sleep in each other's arms. No rules. You are free to do what you want to do. You are officially playing house. After a few months you start to feel....invaded. It isn't bad to feel that way but know that the invasion isn't being done on purpose. You start to notice it slowly. You start to feel a little crapped and uncomfortable. For the fellas it may be a shock seeing tampons in the bathroom and all of a sudden your killer dude pad is now pink and frilly. For the ladies things might not be so ladies like anymore. It is ok that he farts it may be horrifying at first but for the sack of love we endure their smells and sounds.


                          


    When personal space is being invaded it is important to respect boundaries. Make sure to take some me time when you feel like you need a little space. Go for a walk. Take a bubble bath. Take a drive. Take the dog to the park. Go shopping. Read. Get a message. Meditate. Go to the gym. Go for a run. Write. Build something. Crafts. Take up a hobby or class.  It is ok to take some separate time from each other. It is health for the relationship and will avoid may explosive arguments. Me time can even save a relationship.


                  


        If you are experiencing some invasion of space talk through it right away! This issue really isn't a big one so don't make a big deal over it. Set boundaries. Set some guild line but not rules! Be like "Hun can you please not turn off my tv shoe to put on the game? Please ask me first. If I can watch my show later you can watch the game. Just ask." or "Hey babe. Can you make sure to clean up all your makeup and put it away so I can have room for my stuff in the bathroom?"  Each of you every week set some me time a side for yourselves. Communication is the key to fixing any mishap or problem in any relationship. Remember. Keep living. Keep learning. Keeping Laughing. Keep loving.

Relationship VS Friendships

   

Relationship VS Friendships

       Relationships and friendships are a like in so many ways. They both can be toxic or amazing. They both good or bad can be life changing in so many different ways. They can both be positive or heart breaking. It all depends on the person and the people in the relationship.

                                                    

       Personally I have my fair share of failed friendships. I'll see someone from high school that I use to be really close to and itll just be a hi and bye. The way I feel is as you grow ether people grow with you or they drift away. It's very sad it's true but that's just how life rolls. Then there are times where you are made to cut ties with a friend. That's my life story! My best friend of 14 years I had to cut ties with because of lies and jealousy. Friendships for me where full of drama and headache so I decided I just didn't need that negative in my life.

                                 

        My husband on the other hand is total opposite! He feels if he doesn't have his group of friends he has a empty hole. He feels like male companies is a must to a complete happy life. He likes to go to the gym with his bros and party's with his group of friends. He even has man dates with his best friend. He also plays video games with his bros. I do understand where my husband is comeing from. Companionship is important in life. For me my husband is my bestfriend. He is the one I talk about everything with. He is the one I want to spend all my time with. I share everything with him. We laugh together. We cry together. Noone understands me like my husband does. I rather stay in with a movie then go out and party. I dont need anyone else because I have him and that's all I want. My husband is also younger then me by two years. He is 20 and I am 22. Because he is so young he still feels the need to go out with his friends. I don't complain about him hanging out with his friends. I go to his friends party's, put on a nice smile, and try my best to fit in with everyone. Just because I put on a pretty face doesn't mean that his friendships don't bother me sometimes.


                                    
     His friends and even their parents have had negative things to say about out relationship. Me and my husband have been together for 3 years but he friends think I make him grow up too fast. That's been a problem for me because I have never pressured my husband with anything. I just get upset because I don't feel like its ok for him to be spending the night with his best friend 3 nights out of the week leave me all alone. We both work so we hardly get any time together all ready so the time we do have is really precious to me. I am his wife and there has to be a time when I can say ok I think it's time we had alone time. Maybe even take me on a date instead of your best friend.


                              
     I love my husband dearly and I know his friends mean alot to him so I just let him do his thing because I know as he gets older he'll settle down more. So ladies my advice for you if your husband or boyfriend is having a bromance or like spending time with his friends just go with it. Even spends some time with him and his friends. He'll really appreciate that you know what is important to him and you don't push him. But know when to cross the line. Know when to say ok I need some love over here please.:) if his friendships really bother you tell him! Talk it out. I know it may fell like it some times but he can't read your mind. He can't make it better if you don't tell him what's what.
   Keep loving. Keep living.
                     Xoxo wizzy

Relationships VS Exs

                                


                                                                  Relationship VS Exs




         Ex's...some of them move on with their lives but then you have the ones who don't want you but don't want you to be with anyone else. Of course you know the type. The ones who can go out with anyone but don't want you to be happy. I noticed that it more happens with girls then guys! Ex's are hard to get over depending on the relationship. They really do like to mess things up when you find something good.

                    

        Now Exs were a big problem when me and my husband first started dating. He didn't have the best track record before we met. There was only two of his ex's that really bothered me. We will call them EX A and Ex B. Well Ex B wasn't anything really serious. She was one of those....there really isn't a nice word for it....sluts! I am really not being judge mental she really was a slut. She would sleep with a guy just because he gave her a ride home from the party! Really girl just give him gas money not your vagina! Their relationship really didn't last long but once me and my husband started dating she came out of the wood work. She would txt him asking him for birthday sex and asking if me and him had sex! Who does that! After that my husband deleted her number for good! Now Ex A was a little more serious....he even said he thought she was the one. She was the type of girl who liked to play head games with people. She really hurt my husband but when we met of course I fixed all that! The first night we met he said he knew I was the real girl he was going to grow old with. Ex A really didn't like that she even told him I was only of his brilliant mistake and that we never last. She even got really pissed because he didn't say hi to her while me and him where on a date. Back when they dated she told him she fell out of love with him then wanted him back when she got bord. He finally cut ties with her then met me about a month later. Even after 4 years she still wants him to run back to her. She is the ex that doesn't want the guy but doesn't want anyone else to be happy with him.

                     

        Now they don't always have to have had a romantic relationship or been bf and gf to be an ex. Their are also sometimes the sex Exs. The girls they hooked up with, fuck buddies, one night stands, and the sexting buddies. Luckily i haven't had much trouble with these exs! No its normal for guys to sexting buddies. Most guys and girls have them now a days. My husband had one who he was very close friends with. It really didn't bother me at first because the past is the past i am the future. Then she started to try to sext him while me and him where together. So not ok! Then my husband match her and his best friend up. It was so awkward being around her. She would always check him.out and tried being really flirty with him. Turns out she had been cheating the whole year she had been with my husbands best friend. Thankfully none of us talk to her anymore.


                         

   Exs have been one of my biggest speed pumps in my relationship because i hated seeing how much they hurt him and wanted to hurt us. So here is some advice. Release that your his upgrade! Don't stoop to their level! you are better then the rest that is why he is with you and not them. If he really wanted them he would still be after them. He is with you because you are ment to be together. When you do happen to run ito his ex smile big, hold onto his arm, and lay a big kiss on him! show them what they let go and are never getting back. Be proud to be the one he choose to spend his life with. The past doesn't matter because you are his girl now and you'll never hurt him. You make his life better and a hell of a lot easier. There is no reason to fight an ex after all you already one the prize.

Relationships VS The Honeymoon Phase

The honeymoon phase!

  Ah the honeymoon phase. One of the sweetest times in any relationship. For those of you who don't know what the honeymoon phase is let me take a moment to explain. The honeymoon phase is at the beginning of every relationships. It consist of butterflies that feel more like killer bees in your stomach, blushing, everything is all sunshine and rainbows, you guys never fight, he's charming, she's lovely, you smile so much your cheeks heart, your heart pounds, you want you spend all your time together, you can't keep your hands off each other, blowing off plans to hangout with each other, endless PDA, etc.  It is a magical time where you and your partner our just figuring things out and finding out more and more about each other. Admit it! You giggled like a little school girl at his jokes! Alas this phase doesn't last forever. 

   There comes a time where the honeymoon period does end but that doesn't mean the relationship has to end as well. The honeymoon phase tends to end around 6 months to a year. That when most relationship die off or the couple give up because things aren't as easy as it use to be. It doesn't have to be that way. The honeymoon phase doesn't make a relationship what comes after does. When you finally get into a groove as a couple things seem to simmer down. How many time have you said " We act like an old married couple already?!". So tell me what is so wrong with being like and old married couple. I personally love it! The pressure is off now! You can lay around looking a hot mess and your man still loves you! Thing get tough that's how we learn and grow. You may fight a little bit more and cuddle a little bit less but that shouldn't change the way you feel about each other. It should just make you stronger as a couple.  The first year is the easiest, the five years after that are the hardest, but if you tick it through its all down hill after that. 

   Wanna know how to get through the tough years after the honeymoon ends? All is not lost! Even though the honeymoon is over doesn't mean the butterflies and good times have to stop. The main thing to remember is don't forget how to treat each other. Never ever go to bed angry! If you have a fight even if it takes all night talk it through till you get it all out on the table and get everything you need to off your chest. You never go to bed mad at each other because the next day isn't a guarantee. Fighting is a good thing because if you give up fighting then that's when it's over. Say I love you as much as possible you can never say it enough. You don't  need to do big things. A little love note or a surprise romantic dinner date at home with his favorite meal will do the trick nicely. Little everyday reminders are important tell her she beautiful if her sweats and her hair a mess. Tell him that you love him more then the first day you met. Tell each other everything. Be each others best friend. Own up if you make a mistake. Learn together. Grow together. Never give up. That's how you make it work.

keep loving. keep living.

                       xoxo wizzy

Relationships VS Sex

Relationships VS Sex

       Sex and intimacy is very important in healthy relationship! Making love is a key way to connect with your partner on all levels. Lets face it making love in real life is far from what we see in the movies or read in our romance novels. If there you and your partner are talking about making that first step into intimacy or if you are a couple who are just looking to spice up things in the bed room I've got some sexy tips, tricks, and advice for you love birds! 

                                            

       Movies and romance novels make making love look so simple, easy, and perfect! That is just not how it works in real life. Sometimes positions don't always work and sometimes things just don't go as planned. Sometimes you may even get some weird body sounds. The most important thing is to be ready and be relaxed. Don't put too much pressure on yourself if you aren't ready then take your time! If your partner truly loves you and wants to be with you he/she will wait till you are ready. Before you can truly make love you have to love yourself. You have to love your body. You have to feel confident and sexy in your own skin. If you don't feel comfortable in your skin then you won't be comfortable when it comes time to make love. Take as much time as you need. If your partner is willing to wait but get antsy there are other things you can do with out having sex. If you aren't ready to make love but are comfortable about exploring other ways  of intimacy there are a few things you and your partner can try and can even bring you closer as a couple. 1) A make out session! Just relax and go with it. kissing can be so powerful and passionate that you don't even have to take your clothes off to enjoy it. 2) Some heavy petting 3) Male attention. If your man is being patient about waiting you should reward him with some special attention just for him! 4) Intimate messages 5) Masturbation. Touching yourself and each other can be great from getting sexually comfortable with each other. Once you are ready make it special. Plan a date that is special to the relationship. Talk it over with your partner. Plan a special night for the both of you. Make a nice dinner, light a few candles, draw a warm bubble bath for two, play some soft music, take your time with each other, get to know each other's bodies, and above all enjoy each other.

                                                                                                                                                               
                             


      You would think as you get older and as your relationship mature that sex and intimacy would get easier! Everyday stresses such as work, bills, money, children, and school can really hit hard in the bed room. Once you are officially a grown up and out on your own you become stressed out,tired, and just completely out of energy. After dealing with work, bills that need to be paid, annoying people, and hyper children all day the last think you wanna do is be sexy at the end of the night. After a hard day once your head hit the people you are normal knocked out! Sadly it has become ok to put intimacy on the back burner due to everyday life! That is so not ok! It is important to keep the fire burning in your relationship. It is important to be passionate with the man or woman you love. You still need to feel like a sexy woman and a wanted man.Some people let life get to them so much they stop kissing and even talking. To keep the passion going it is important to take some time out of life to be together and to be romantic. Here are a few things to keeping it hot in a long term relationship. 1) Date night! You should at least go out every two weeks on a romantic date. Go to a nice quite dinner, a romantic walk through a park or beach, catch the movie that you both been dying to see, or go to a concert. 2) A romantic get away. It doesn't have to be every month but once in a blue moon when you have a little extra money in the bank it is ok to go on a romantic weekend trip! The grandparents will love to have the grand-babies for a visit. 3)Dressing up! Trow in something sexy! Try a fun costume or lingerie. 4) Message oils and Lubricants. Have fun go shopping together and pick out new spicy things to try in the bed room.


                 


      Making love is all about loving yourself and your soul mate. It is about being full into your own body as well as your partners body. It isn't all about feeling good. It is about connecting on a new level. It is about becoming one with each other body and spirit. It is important to take your time if you aren't ready and not letting the fire die out. Remember that it is important with every new sexual relationship to protect your self and your partner. One of the first things to talk about when starting a sexual relationship is getting tested. You and your partner should both get tested before become sexually active. Talk about protection from pregnancy and STDS. Visit your doctor and make sure you are ready for sex. This is a big step in a relationship don't take it lightly. If your sex life isn't as steamy as it once one just add a little spice to it. Dress up and go out! Even on your most stressful days at the end of the night cuddle up and just talk about your day. If you don't have time for a full on date night schedule some mini dates during the week like a lunch date in the park. Practice make perfect! Don't sweat the small stuff! Have fun! Keep living! Keep loving!

Relationships VS Abuse

Relationships VS Abuse

       Abuse is something I can sadly say I know a lot about. I have witnessed and been abused on many levels. There are a lot of different levels to abuse. Sadly abuse happens in 1.5 million relationships per year. 4,000 women die each year from dating or relationship abuse. Studies show that one in ten high school students admit to being slapped, hit, or physically hurt by a boyfriend or girlfriend. I am 1 out of them 1.5 million women. Here is my story.

                                                   

       Abuse started in my life when i was growing in my mother's womb.  My father who was abused as a child started abusing my mother not very soon after the got married. Once they got married she was his property in his eyes. His and his only. Even though they lived next door to her family she wasn't aloud to see or speak to them. My grandmother was going through breast cancer and my mother couldn't even be there for here. Even she got pregnant with me the abuse just got worse and worse. To make sure she wouldn't leave the house he would put furniture up against the door so she couldn't get out. He would count all the food and drinks at the house. The only time my mother could eat was when my father aloud her to. He said what she eat, how much, and when. When my mother was only 7 months pregnant with me my father decided to go on a rampage. He threw her over the coach and started beating her with no mercy. He beat her so back he threw her into early labor. I was born 2 months early on May 5 1991. Because of all the distress I had rapped the cord around my neck. They had to preform emergency c-section to save me and my mother. My grandmother says that I was saved by amazing grace.

       Everything was good for a while. My father stopped hitting my mom for about a year then he started hitting on me instead. When my mom had to go to work and he didn't want to deal with me he lock me in my car seat. Once when I wouldn't stop crying he threw the car seat with me in it at the wall. Then he sat back down to watch tv. I had a minor concussion. My mother said I fell. She seemed to say that a lot. The beatings just kept coming. I use to cry out for my mother but she wouldn't stop it she wouldn't help me. Thanks to that we don't have that mother daughter relationship that I always wanted. One time when I was 5 years old it was hot because it was summertime. My father was sitting in front of the tv eating dinner. I didn't think and took a sip of his soda. In return he stabbed me in the shoulder with his streak knife.  This time my mother couldn't say I just fell. Instead of taking me to get stitches she put a bunch of band-aids on it and hoped for the best. My mother tried running once but he caught up to us and with his own daughter in the car ran us off the roads. The beatings went up till I was 7 years old. Then one day he was just gone and so was everything else. He took everything even the nails on the walls! Even though he was gone it was finally ok. We where finally at peace. We had nothing. Not a cent in the bank so we moved in with my mom's parents. 

                                           

       The yelling stopped. The beatings stop. I was in a safe place. No one else was going to hurt me. I had no idea what to do with the hurt and pain the was inside me. My family believe therapy meant you where weak. So I kept it all inside. When I turned 10 years old I started hanging out with older kids that where up to no good. They would all steal alcohol from their parents then we would all go down to that park and pass bottles around. With that first sip I realized here was something that finally took away the pain. Once it took the pain away I didn't want to stop. I didn't stop. I kept drinking. I kept being around people I shouldn't.  When I was 13 i was drugged and raped at a party. I was a virgin. Three older guys bet who could get me into bed first. I woke up alone, naked, scared, hurting, and feeling lost. I ran as fast as I could home. Then cried myself into a bottle of jack. The next day I was tell a friend was happened to me and she said she could help. That was the first time I did cocaine. From their it was a downward spiral. I did every drug i could get my hands on and their wasn't a single moment in the day where i didn't have a drink handy. When I was a sophomore in high school I met a guy. A guy who was 10 years older them me. He was a popular underground music producer in out part scene. He loured me in with lie and lie. Till I was trapped. I became his pawn in his game of life. He raped, controlled, terrified, and beat me. I couldn't do anything with out him knowing. It was a living nightmare. I was always being watched. Once when I tried fighting back he put a gun in my face. He pulled the trigger with no hesitation but the gun was empty. So instead he tried beating me to death with the gun I passed out. I woke up somewhere in a gutter the next morning. I hadn't been sober in 6 years till the day I found out I was pregnant with my son LeeLand. Unlike my mother i fought back and ran away. Far away. There was no way I was going to let any man hurt my child the way men hurt me my whole life. 

                                                    

        

       I met Charlie my fiancee when I was just turning 4 months pregnant. The first night we met was so magical. For the first time in my life someone was there who wanted to listen and who wanted to help. I could really talk to him. I told him everything that night. The abuse, drinking, drugs, and my pregnancy. After hear everything he still wanted to be with me. He was willing to raise and love Lee like his own son. He really loved me. He reallyed loved the real me. He saw the woman I could be. Who i wanted to be. Only a few weeks after me and Charlie got together the withdraws finally took over and i went into early labor. I thought if I just laid in bed then I could fight the pain. That it would just go away. Then I started bleeding. I went to the hospital. A few hours later I delivered a still born baby boy.  With the loose of my LeeLand it would have been so easy to relapse into my old ways. If I didn't have Charlie I would have died. He kept me strong. He was truly my light in the darkest of times. He taught me i was worth being loved. He taught me what love truly is. Thanks to him I have been sober for almost 4 years. 

                    

       There are many different types of abuse. There is the obvious physical and emotional abuse but there is also verbal and mental abuse. I am not trying to give guys a bad name and put it all on them. I have scene cases where women abuse the men! There are men out there who would never hit a women but get into a relationship where a women beats on them. Physical abuse is when someone purposely  inflicts injury or pain onto another person. Emotional abuse can cause  anxiety, chronic depression, or post-traumatic stress disorder. Verbal abuse is when something is said to someone that is demeaning or hurtful. Mental abuse is when the abuse messes with your head like " You are worthless" or "You can't leave no one else will want you.". A abusive relationship consist of all these different types of abuse. 

                

       Women sell them selves out for roses and a box of chocolates. We given in to I love you, I'm sorry, and I won't do it again. Don't sell yourself so short. You are worth it! You are worthy of being loved and being happy. If your relationship showed signs of abuse run why you still can run. One hit, push, slap, mean word, punch is all one to many. Don't fall for the I love yous and I won't do it agains. They will do it again and again until you are death or gone. Take my advice tell a friend, teacher, family member or anyone you can trust. Go to support groups. Go to the police. Go to a safe place like a church, family home, shelters for abused women and children, or friends home. Go somewhere he or she can't find you. Take your time to heal. Go to therapy. Going doesn't mean you are weak. Go to meetings. Talk to families and friends. Take your time before starting to date again. Let yourself heal and grow again. Find your strength again. Keep loving. Keep living. Keep laughing. The greatest gift is to love and be love in return.

Relationships VS Pet Peeves

Relationships vs Pet Peeves 

       It is inevitable in life and relationship to find something that is going to drive you nuts! That little something is called a pet peeve! We all have them. Even the nicest people in the world have pet peeves. It's just human nature to get annoyed. Pet peeves are not big deal and are normal however they can become a issue in a relationship depending on how big the peeve is. 

                                          

       Your significant other can do things that are as annoying or even more annoy then anyone else you come in contact with on  a daily basis.    If you are anything like me you tend to feel bad when it comes time in the relationship where pet peeves start to surface. After all this is the person you love most in the whole world! How can they get on your last nerve the way they do?!  It is very simple. This is the person closest to you on every level. This the person you spend most if not all your time together so sooner or later there are going to be little things here or there that will pluck your nerves.  Every one and every relationship is different. That means not everyone's pet peeves are the same. 

  

                                          

       Pet peeves can go from small annoyances to extreme craziness!  It can be something small like the way they eat, leaving the toilet seat up, putting an empty milk carton back in the fridge, cover hog, stealing food off your plate, hogging the tv remote, or not asking for directions. Then there are bigger pet peeves that can cause fights and even be red flags in the relationship such as always being late, not cleaning up at yourself, saying crude or rude things, money behavior like spending to much money with out talking about it first, knowing your partner need sleep but wakes them up anyway, bad hygiene, or not listen when you have something important to tell them. When you start fighting about pet peeves that when it becomes an issue. Some pet peeves can be caused by a bigger underlining issue in the relationship like trust or respect. 

                  

       Don't sweat the small stuff. When dealing confronting pet peeves prioritize the highly annoying ones. So you don't overwhelm your partner only discuss one or two pet peeves at a time. You don't want to make it sound like a bigger issue then is really is so try your best to be delicate about how you address the issue you can. Try saying something like " This isn't a huge issue but I would really like to talk about it with you.". Only talk about the action that is getting on your nerves not the person his/her self. Remember you love them but you don't love their behavior so focus on the action. For example when approaching the issue say " I really wish you wouldn't leave your dirty clothes on the bathroom floor. Can you please put them in our hamper?" in stead of just saying " You are so lazy.".  After talking about your pet peeves ask them if they are will to work on it instead of coming of bossy or demanding they change their actions. You are not perfect so be prepared for your partner to bring up the pet peeves they have about you. A thank you goes a long way. You check more flies with honey then with vigor after all. Thank them for being willing to change and for listening. If they do make a improvement be sure to thank them for trying. This can be a learning lesson for the both of you. It isn't worth loosing something that could be great over. In stead of holding it in till you blow up try saying something as soon as you notice there could be an issue. Sooner is always better! Keep living! Keep Laughing! Keep loving! 

       

Relationships VS Trust

            

       Trust and Honesty go hand in hand in any good relationship. The recipe for a great long lasting relationship just won't work without these two accentual ingredients. Trust and honesty have to be built strong from day one! A willingness to be vulnerable is a significant feature of  lasting relationships. You want a relationship in which your partner is your allies not your foe. 

                    

    Where there is no trust there is no love and if there is no trust there is no us. Trust is like glass once you break it no matter how much you try to fix it or try to hold it together it not ever gonna be exactly how it was. A relationship with out trust is like have a cell phone that has no service....what do you do with it? You are just playing games on it. Once you break someone's trust it becomes a crack in the relationship. Just like a crack in a car windshield it starts small but with every bump in the road it just gets worse and worse. However you can't just fix your relationship like you would a windshield. Trust takes years to build up but only seconds to fall apart. 

                                     

    

      Once the trust has been broken you'll start rethinking everything starting back to the beginning. Do they mean it when they say they love me? Is it my fault?  Did he really go to the store or did he go somewhere he should be? How do I trust again? Will they lie again? Will I get hurt again? What else have they not been truthful about? You start second guessing everything your partner does or says. You wanna try to mend things but who's to say they won't lie again. You wanna make it work but you can't just pretend to forgive them when you are still hurting. Broken trust just brings tears and fights. So where do you go from here?

                   

      All is not lost! You can fix this crack in the windshield of your relationship. Broken trust is like the rock bottom in a relationship. What happens when you hit rock bottom? There is no place to go but up! There is no magic glue that will fix the trust that has been broken and it won't happen over night. First you have to be honest! If you plan to break that trust again. If you plan to lie again. Then walk away. Someone's heart isn't a cell phone without service. Don't just play games. If you aren't 100 percent invested just walk away. If you do wanna make it work its going to take work. Buying a dozen roses and a million sorrys just isn't gonna cut it. You have to rebuild from the grown up. When rebuilding the strongest foundation you can have is honesty. Once the both of you are ready sit down. This a important part. Even though you are hurt you need to let them come clean without fighting or interrupting. If you don't feel like you are ready to let them be honest without interrupting then wait till you are ready.  Once you sit down and get everything out on the table then you can start healing and moving forward. First after hearing the trust decide if you wanna really make it work and if it worth moving forward.  If it is worth is  Start slow. Don't rethink everything. You have to move forward not back. Give them a chance to make everything right. It will take both sides to make it work. You can't constantly accuse them of lying. If you aren't will to rebuild then walk away. Try your best to avoid a fight. Fighting fixes nothing. Take it slow. Grow. Remember there is no  where to go but up. Keep living. Keep learning. Keep loving.

       

Relationships vs Religion

   Relationships vs Religion



                                                   

     Pretty much most of the worlds population today believes in something!   No matter what religion it is all of them gave rules! Rules that make relationships confusing! Now different religions have different views on relationships and love. Some embrace it and then there are some that seem to be strict about who you can love and how you can love them. Like many thing religion can be a very big and stressful thing in any relationship. 

     Now I don't want it to seem like I am putting down any religion. I myself am catholic. I have made all the sacraments that I can right now.  i pray all the time for those I love. I got to church every Sunday morning. I went all though catholic education. I love God and my faith is strong in him. However that doesn't mean i believe in everything the catholic church believes in. Lets talk about SEX! It has been pounded in my head at a young age that sex was bad unless you where married and only doing it to breed babies! I'm sorry catholic church but I disagree with you on this one! Now I'm no sex maniac! I don't go spreading my legs for every tom, dick, and harry. I believe you don't have SEX you MAKE LOVE! Those are too very different things! You don't have to be married because marriage doesn't work for everyone out there. However you should be in love with the person you are giving yourself to. It should be someone who loves you not uses you. It should be with someone who you can see yourself spending forever with married or not.  I think God feels the same way.    After all the bible does say it is better to place your seed in the belly of a whore then waste it.

                                

     The church also has a lot to say about same sex couples. My option is....what does loving the same sex have anything to do with religion! Why can't two women or two men love each other and still love the lord. As long as they aren't hurting anyone why would the go to hell just for loving.  I believe God is fine with gay marriage and relationship! After all he did make them! He made them in his likeness! I believe we are all perfect and lovable in God's eyes. If he didn't want their to be gay people then he wouldn't have created any. The church is so fast the judge the wrong people.

        
                                              

       Another stressful thing about religion and relationship is couples with two different religions! Now you have double the rules to deal with! It is all so overwhelming!  What church to attend? What happens when we decide to get married? When we have kids what will religion will they follow? Then families get involved just added more stress. A Jewish mother will want her daughter to marry a nice Jewish boy. A nice catholic boy is expected to marry a nice church girl. Most the time if you do want to get married you have to convert. I think that's foolish! We all basically believe the same things! We all believe in God. We all pray. It doesn't matter where you worship. Just as long as you do.

 

     Here is my ADVICE! Love God and Love each other! There are so many things in today's world that stress out and and put  pressure on relationships don't add another. Don't read to much into the rules that religion ties onto relationships and what they should or shouldn't be. God loves us just the way he created up. Keep the faith. Pray as much as you can. Keep loving God! Never forget that he loves you! Be you! Keep living and keep loving.!

Hello June!

                                




            It's June!!! I can't believe it! Where did May go?! June is one of my favorite months! There is so much going on in the month of June. For starts we have father's day! Then in that same week it's Charlie's ( my incredible hubby) 21st birthday!. Because it is his 21st birthday we have to go big! You only turn 21 once! So his birthday is going to be a week long affair. We will be doing several different family party and friend get together. We both have that week off and I am over the moon excited! A week after Charlie's birthday is my brother in law John's  birthday. Not to mention our 4 year and 4 month anniversary is on Charlie's birthday. Add in blogging and work! We have a very busy month a head of us! WELCOME JUNE!

Scariest Thing Tag!

                 

                           SCARIEST THING TAG!!!!

          I am not ashamed to admit....I AM A BIG FAT SCAREDY CAT! I am afraid of the dark! I can't watch scary movies I just hide my head in my hubby's chest and shake in fear! I tell myself it's just a movie but that doesn't stop me from freaking out then having to watch old Disney movies to calm me down! I thought this tag would be a perfect for a scaredy cat like me! Enjoy!!! Feel free to leave a comment what scares you! 

1)  Scariest real-life experience?

              Three years ago I had to get surgery to have my gallbladder removed. I just woke up in the middle of the night with the worse pain I had ever felt. I was terrified because I had no idea what was going on. I was rushed to the hospital where they gave me different pain pills but nothing worked until they gave me a morphine drip! When I came out of surgery the doctor told me the infection was much worse then they thought. When they opened me up the air hit the infection and it started to spread. My heart rate and blood pressure started to plummet. They almost lost me on the table. I ended up in the hospital for a whole week! 

2)   Scariest paranormal experience?

              This happens a lot in my family. We are huge believes of spirits and the paranormal. My biggest and scariest experience was one day I was pulling my clean clothes out of the driver I bent over and I felt something extremely cold go through the center of my chest lingers for a moment then exiting through my back. I felt like I was blacked out for hours but it was only a few seconds. I didn't even know it but I let out a blood curtailing scream! I wasn't myself the whole day after that!

3)   Have you know anyone convicted of a violent crime?

             Yes

4)   Are you afraid of the dark?

              Yes! I hate the dark! If I have to pass through a room that is dark I just run through as fast as I can! The only was I can sleep in the dark is when I have my brave hubby to hold on to.

5)   What is your greatest fear?

              My greatest fear is losing the ones I love more then anything! I have lost so many people that mean the world to me. It is the worst feeling in the world.

6)    Scariest movie?

              I hate the SAW movies!! If I even see a second of them I won't sleep for weeks!

7)   Does your hometown/city have any scary stories tied to it?

           YES! Baltimore is full of scary urban legends! 

New Year! New You!

                                               
                                                 New Year....New Me!



          With the 2014 year upon us I have totally been focused on a new chapter in my life. This year I plan to buckle down! Buckle down with my future, my health, and my finances. I finally have an amazing job that I enjoy so much! So 2014 is the time to focus on my hustle and my money. I have been working a few days a week so I have saved up a few checks. This week is going to be a big week in buckling down for me because this week me and the hubby are heading to the bank to open my very first my very own bank account. This is defiantly a sign of growth and it will help me a lot with saving my money. My plan it to put all my money in the bank, starting to pay of my debts, and saving up for our car. If everything goes as planned I will have my dept cleared in the next year! Also big for me in the new year is getting my health where I want it to be. For a while I was getting back on track but then I fell off a bit. I am really determined to get my body and mind right! My goal weight is 120. My goal size is small. I also want to be able to complete a hike by the end of summer and look good in high waist shorts and a crop top. My goal for the new year is just to perfect my body and my life. What's your goals for the new year? Comment below!

Hello march! <3

It's hard to believe it already march! I do have to admit it doesn't feel like March with this crazy Baltimore weather! I sure am ready for spring! I'm ready for the nice spring days full of sunshine and the freshly  bloomed flowers. I am welcomeing March with opened arms! March is all about the money and the hustle! This month I am slowly going back to work. In March I will be working 1-3 days a week. Then in April I will start working full time. I am very excited to get back to my hustle. This month I will be opening my first bank account. I will also start putting money away and saving up. We are very busy with football this month. My hubby now plays for a semi pro team. Of course I am the camera lady. Very proud to be! We are working with a great team! We have practices and games every weekend so football is definitely keeping us busy in March. We are also starting to look at car! This is very exciting! We are both saving up for a car that is going to make life so much easier. Right now we are just window shopping to see what works best for us. I am also getting my body back where I would like it! That means hitting the gym and working out at home. It also means cutting of fast foods! Ugh! Dreading that! I love me some McDonald's! But I want my dream beach body and I am willing to work hard for it! So what's ya'll plans for March?! Comment below! <3

I GOT A JOB!!!

                  



          I am so excited to announce that I am officially employed! I am now a full time nanny for two great families! I am caring for two newborns. A baby girl named Ryan and a baby boy name Leo. I love the families and the kids are amazing. The families contacted me through the website sittercity.com. We hit it off right away! I can't wait to finally start working again. I am so grateful for the time I had off to just be a wifey and focus on my blogs but I can't wait to start making money again. When I got the call I got the job I felt like a weight had been lifted off of me. After looking for so long and interview after interview it felt great to get that call. It also feels great that the families are excited to work with me as well. I feel like I am ready to turn to the next chapter of my life. It will be hard for a while. It will take a while to adjust to not being there and waking up with my hubby. It will be hard leaving him in the mornings and by the time I get home he will already be at work. So we are going to loose a lot of time with each other but he will also  be getting another job in June and then we will be on the same work schedule. I am so ready to get my hustle on! :)

My Ohana

                             

                                          MY OHANA

          Ohana means family. Family means no one gets left behind or forgotten. Family is a huge apart of my life. They are so key to who I am today that I wanted to share my family with you all. I come from a huge Greek, German, and Irish family. As you can imagine we are very loud! We don't yell. We just talk really REALLY loud. We do big very well. Big meals. Big Family. Big get togethers. Big dreams. Big hearts. BIG LOVE. We may not always see eye to eye but we always have each others backs. We may fuss with eat other through the day but we always kiss each other good night and say we love each other. I grew up very blessed. I grew up in a house filled with love. I lived with my aunt, my two uncles, my little brother, my mom, and my grandparents. Yup all of us in one row house. We only had one bath room! You can all just imagine how that was. A nightmare. We struggled. Somehow we managed to keep it together. We always had food on the table and a warm bed to rest our head. I am so thankful for my family and what they have instilled in me.

                            

                                              MY POP

          I didn't have a birth father in my life. I was lucky enough to have an amazing grandfather who made an incredible father figure. Growing up it didn't faze me that my birth father wasn't around because I have my grandfather to fill that void. He did everything a father is suppose to do and more. He was protective and always keeping me on the straight and narrow. He wasn't the biggest guy in the world but he was tough. He didn't take crap off of anyone no matter how big they were. He was the strength of our family. He worked hard and long hours just to make sure we had everything we needed. He would get up at the crack of dawn to go grocery shopping. When we all woke up he already had the house clean, hot coffee made, and our favorite fresh doughnuts. Every Saturday we would watch cops and Americas most wanted. On the weekends I would wait up late and he would take me on his nightly rounds at his work. He would hold my arm when crossing the street no matter how old I was. Everyday he would pick me up from school and wait right out front the doors. Some may see that as embarrassing but it was love to us. He didn't say it much. He didn't need to because we showed it through his actions. He was the man in my life for a really long time. I grew up wanting my prince charming to be just like him. Sadly we lost him almost 6 years ago to a bad heart. It was very hard....still is....much I know and I can feel him always looking over my shoulder. He is always there to show me the way. R.i.p pop gone but never forgotten!

                                                      

                                                                     MY GRANDMA

            My grandma is the heart and soul to our family. She has such an amazing heart! She gives to everyone. We are extremely close. Growing up we couldn't be away from each other. If we spent more then a couple hours one of us would get sick. We where inseparable during my childhood. Every night she was the one who tucked me in. She would tell me stories and sing me to sleep. One of my favorite memories is every night she would sing me the guardian angel prayer. She taught me to be a lady but not to let anyone walk all over you. People say I get my attitude from her. She is the sweetest woman on earth until you mess with her family. She taught me how to be a home maker, a dedicated wife, and beyond amazing loving mother. Now that I am madly in love with my husband I have a huge new found respect for her. Just the thought of me losing my husband brings me to tears. I don't know how she has the strength to get out of bed everyday after loosing my grandfather. She not only gets out of bed but she really keeps this family moving. She is honestly the warmest, strongest, caring, loving, and classiest woman I have ever met. I am so proud to be her granddaughter and to follow in her amazing footsteps.


                                           

                                                                         MY MAMA


          Me and my mama don't have your typical mom and daughter relationship. My mom isn't your typical cookie cutter mom. This mite not make scene to a lot of people but if you watch the show sons of anarchy you'll get it.  My mother is Gemma Teller! My mom is a wild one! She rode on the back of Harley's and guys had epic battles over her! She has no filter and says whatever pops into her head. She has her faults and we butt heads often but she has a special kind of strength. She raised me and my brother without either of our fathers around. They only support she got raising  us was her family. Our fathers didn't support us financially so my mom had to work three jobs. She worked three jobs and put herself through nursing school. She worked her butt off so we didn't need to go with out. She taught me the meaning of hard work and how to hustle for what I want. She taught me that hard work pays off. My mama is one bad bitch and I wouldn't trade her for the world! She may not realize it but I do love my mom to the moon and back. I will forever love her and defend her. I don't want the typical cookie cutter mother and daughter relationship. I wouldn't trade our special mother and daughter relationship for the world.


                                
                                                                   MY LITTLE BOOGER


              My brother and I are 10 years apart in age! He is honestly a great kid and I have truly enjoyed watching him grow into the most amazing young gentleman. So first of let me explain his nickname. When he was born the movie "Hot Chick" came out and the main character's little brother's nickname is booger. I dance for 14 years and I love fashion so I had a crap lode of old costumes and heels around the house. He loved to dress up in my old costumes! He was super dooper into the wiggles and he use to dress up in my high heel boots pretending he was captain feather sword. The brother in the movie "Hot Chicks" dressed up in his sister's closed and high heels. I started calling my brother booger and I still call him booger till this day! He hates it but he will forever be my little booger! I was so mean to him when we where growing up! When he asked me where he came from I told him he was from fedex and they dropped him off at the wrong house! He has two little scars on his forehead from when he was born so I always told him he was an alien and those scars where were his tentacles where. haha. Good times! He is 13 years old but honestly he is the most mature and respectful teenage I ever met! I am so proud of who he is! He does so well in school and he is very close to getting his black belt is kenpo karate!  He does drive me crazy from time to time. He is super close to my husband so we are always fighting for his time! Booger always wants his bro time! He is spending the night at our house every chance he gets. I wanted a sister but I am so grateful and thankful God have me my booger. I love my little booger!


                                                        
                                                                      MY AUNT PATTY

   
          My aunt Patty is more like a mom then an aunt! She is my mom's sister. She was like 16 years old when I was born. The first place I went after I came home from the hospital was to pick her up from school. She use to take me with her everywhere with her! She even use to take me with her when she went to study at her best friends house. Along side my grandmother she was a huge mother figure in my life. She made sure I stayed out of trouble and doing what I am suppose to do. She taught me to finish everything I start. I am very thankful for her. I owe a lot to her. She really helped me stay focused. I know I gave her a hard time often but she really is the reason I am where I am. She pushed me to finish school and really apply myself. Show taught me to push myself and never let anyone walk all over me! Every day I push myself to be a better woman because she taught me to push my self.


                              
                                                                 MY UNCLE DAVE


          This man is the reason I am so spoiled! Charlie this is the man you have to thank! haha. He is my mom's brother. He is another father figure in my life. He did a lot of the daddy things. He bought and helped me pick out all the important dresses such as  my prom and homecoming dresses. He taught me how to drive. He spoiled me scene birth! He bought every cute outfit from every store we went to. He took me to all the circus and ice shows. He paid for my dance classes and costumes. He always made sure I had everything I needed and wanted. We spent a lot of time together when I was growing up! He even took me on vacations with him. He was at every swim class and every recital! He would stand in line all night to make sure we had front row tickets to my recital. He supports everything I do and I am so grateful to have him as my uncle!



                                
                                                                   MY UNCLE BILLY


             My uncle Billy is the survivor in our family. He is a survivor of cancer. He is currently going through cancer again. We have a very different type of father daughter relationship. He is the cool uncle. Growing up my uncle and his friends from childhood ( know as the canton boys) would sit on the stoop in the summer drinking beer and reminiscing. I loved to hang out with them! They would sit me up in the tree in front of my house. I was with my boys. I saw them all as my uncles. I used to sit with them for hours and listen to their crazy stories! He isn't perfect and he thinks I love my uncle Dave more then him but I honestly respect him and look up to his strength.




I have learned so much from my ohana! I am the woman I am today because of the wisdom and lessons they have instilled in me. The greatest lesson I have learned is the greatest thing is to love and be loved in return. Ohana means family. Family means no one gets left behind or forgotten.